Tuesday 31 August 2010

Links to picture pages

The first links are coming in, the page has an RSS feed for notifications.

http://groups.google.co.uk/group/dwcon_org_2010/web/pictures-from-dwcon-2010

Calling for submissions and links!

The Chronicle Live is still open for business and we are compiling a page of links to picture collections and individual posts and reports.

If you have a set of pictures online and you are happy for us to link to them please send the link to me at:


If you use flickr for you pictures, please add the DWCon2010 tag as this will be one of the links we list.


Links to reports, plus any content/reports/articles you have for the Chronicle Live can be sent to me at:


We can upload reports for you to the main Chronicle for current and future members to enjoy, just as we did last time. Don't be shy - the bigger the range of people and articles the more interesting it is for our members and those who are tentatively considering dipping a toe in convention waters.

It also acts as an aide memoire for those who had brief moments of being tired and emotional :-)

Why Ian Stewart Goes to Discworld

Just a reminder of the Ian Stewart's great article on The Guardian blog for those of you who missed it by being en route to the Convention:

Monday 30 August 2010

The Lady with the Inflatable Kangaroo

by Nitta
I’ve been chasing her around the halls for two days and finally met her when she was on Watch duty at the Sunday morning booksignings. I wanted to know a bit more about the inflatable kangaroo (as well).
On closer examination she proved to be Sue Weatherwax (some relation of Granny’s, no doubt), and although the kangaroo was not within sight, she had a small white kitten under her pointy hat.

- What is the name of your kangaroo – and which part of Fourecks is he from?
- He’s called Flipper and is from Sydney, like me. It took me 30 hours to get her – but Flipper was not allowed on the plane, so he was smuggled in the country and we arranged a mmeting here, by the Google forum.
- Does he have a special diet?
- Oh, he’s a very light eater – practically lives on air.

Next I wanted to know whether Flipper knew a certain wizard named Rincewind – and he did; moreover, was impressed by his ability to run at high speed.

Talking about future plans Sue mentioned that Flipper would very much like to attend Nullus Anxietas III, the Australian Discworld Convention (to be held in Penrith, NSW, from 8 to 10 April 2011), only it’s difficult to get in live animals. But who knows, he might get in.
Hop over and visit him Down under!

7 – 4 – 1: Mort. A quick chat with the Chairman

by Nitta
When I asked Brian about when he could give me 5 minutes of his time he flipped through the Convention programme, asked someone not to remove the flipchart paper with the day’s schedules, glanced at his watch and said “yes, about now would be the best time”.

I asked what his second most frequently used phrase was (after “Go to Ops!”). He laughed and said. “It’s all good!”
When I asked whether it was true that the next con was going to be held in a desert to fit in all the fans he laughed again and said 900 was a good number. At the last Con the sign-up closed at 800 members – to this one they consulted Terry whether it was OK to add an extra 100 and he agreed, but this really seems to be the outer limit. It’s not easy to find a space that can accommodate so many people, has adequate-sized halls etc.

When I asked who was to be praised or blamed for selecting the Convention’s theme he answered that allegedly that was the chairman’s privilege but in reality it was a joint decision. They pick a book with a strong central theme and build the con around it. Originally Going Postal was picked (“my 2nd favourite book, and also related to my day job”, says Brian), but then they had several meetings discussing the Con theme and came up with The Fifth Elephant instead which had much clearer themes and elements, and it was easier to structure a Convention around it.

I wanted to know how much time he had for his own life between the Conventions. He laughed again and said it varied – the closer the con, the less time for anything else. As everyone among the organisers does this as a voluntary job, time needs to be structured. In the last month before the opening everything revolves around the Con.

I wanted to know whether he read the Discworld novels in hardback or waited until the paperback editions came out. He said he didn’t rush to the books as before, in his teenage years – and as he’s got a limited shelf space, he preferred the smaller, paperback books.
His favourite character is tied with his favourite book: Mort. He has read it first as a teenager and was very much in it; he liked the idea of the boy who goes and gets offered a job by Death, does all those things, nearly rescues a princess, is at the point of beating Death but realises it would be really lonesome afterwards – to Brian this is an awesome story of growing up. He says what was written in 7 volumes in the Harry Potter series and 4 in the Tiffany Aching novels it’s condensed in 1 novel here.
Brian thinks Mort is a greatly underrated character – and what we all remember is his daughter.

Gods and P.E.

by Nitta
Brighid Hurtubise won the Junior Award at the 2010 Maskerade. I talked to her and her dad Josef while queuing for Sunday’s booksignings.

- How did you find the idea?
- I was thinking about gods – and people who don’t like P.E.
- Are you one of them?
- Yes.
- But she’s never been concussed – says her dad.

Brighid has been a Discworld fan since she’s been  6 or 7 years old (do you remember not being a DW-fan – asks Josef). Brighid is also a veteran conventioneer: she attended the 2008 Convention, and also a New Zealand convention. At the last Maskerade they were the Lancre Royal Family, and she was dressed as Esmerelda Margaret Note Spelling of Lancre.

Her favourite Discworld character is Death – because he likes kittens.

The case of the stuck door (The Departure Aria, winners of the Best in Show Award

by Nitta
Jan Uzzell and Min Lacey won the Best in Show Award at the 2010 Maskerade in a dazzling double act, performing the Departure Aria (“Questa maladetta...”) from Maskerade!
I talked to them after the photo call, in a corner of the hall, with conventioneers still coming over to congratulate them and take more pictures.

- It was Jan’s idea – says Min -, she and her music teacher put the character together. We wanted to fit me in as well, and first we thought of a dwarf, then we settled by Walter Plinge.
- The idea came after the last Con – continues Jan – when we saw how much fun the Maskerade was, and we thought: what could we do? We tried to find a minor character and build on that. Because I sing we chose Maskerade as theme, and we were carrying on Terry’s idea: a 17-stone female pretending to be a 17-year-old girl. We wanted the costume to be as over the top as possible.

I asked whether she was a professional singer.
- No, I enjoy singing but I’ll not be a professional. I did singing at school, then I found myself a teacher and now I am a grade 8 singer at the London College of Music.
- Where did you find a fitting music for your act?
- the song was purpose-written by my music teacher who is also a composer on his own right – but he never heard about Terry before, so we had to explain him about the character and the novel.

The pair are both long-time Discworld fans (about 20 years in Min’s and 16 years in Jan’s case); it’s Jan’s 3rd and Min’s 6th Convention. Among Min’s favourite characters are Death, Gaspode, the Librarian – “the standard ones I think” she says. Jan’s favourite is Granny as “she’s so true to form, a beautifully written character, she does everything right”. Oh, and Min was on Mastermind recently, answering Discworld questions.

At this point two fans came up to congratulate them and were discussing the lyrics. They thought the captions held up by Walter were an own translation – whereas they were from the novel, word by word. Jan started to quote the Italian version, and to help her memory she did so singing softly– giving a second encore to the surrounding people.

I asked how they felt about their success. Jan: “It doesn’t feel real yet. I have to phone my husband to tell him about it.”

And so it continues

by Gaz Webber

Wow!

Yeah...wow! I'm in the Metropole Hotel in Birmingham, still at the convention...this is almost certainly going to become the traditional all-nighter...but what a day!

3:40 AM,
This is why I love Discworld above all other conventions.

This morning started with a quick pit-stop at Tesco for a teapot (don't ask) and some food for the journey, and a hat. Especially a hat. Journalists need a hat, it is their raison detre. I purchased a tasteful trilby and asked my style guru and better half, Random_C, about just how much gravitas it provided my already inspiring frame.

After she'd finished laughing we set off for the Con.

The first hour or so consisted of looking around for and at other conventioneers. At any convention the costumes are impressive. At this one they are incredible. Spectacular. Some soar and tower, confections of cloth and creativity. Mightly magnificent milinary tops coiffure. Glitter and glitz vie against bangles and bling for attention. Polar opposites, costumes consisting of flesh and flair, dimples and daring. Low-and-behold versus *You'll have somebody's eye out!*

I was actually heading for the Cavern when I literally bumped into Peter Morwood and Diane Duane. Now, those of you with long memories (or those who have read the foreword in my second book) know that these two people were instrumental in my having the nerve to write a *proper* book at all. And that I have been trying since them to buy them a drink. Yesterday I succeeded ! However...

Peter and Diane are time-sinks. On their own they can fascinate, charm, entertain, amuse and eductate. Together they draw you in to their lives, spinning anecdote after anecdote, story after story, picture of food after picture of food. I have to report that watching the culinary pornography on Peter's laptop caused me to gain nearly a stone in weight. Affable and wonderfully friendly, you are greeted like a long-lost friend, especially if you offer wine and beer, and I would suggest that if you finally drag yourselves reluctantly away you are guaranteed to be ligher of heart, more free of spirit, and in danger of a cholesterol crash...

However...as I was about to leave Jack Cohen arrived.

Jack is, in case you don't know, a young man who has reached the early middle-age of 70. And goodness, what a mind! There are people in who's company you enjoy sitting and listening. There are people in who's company you sit and listen and you struggle to understand, and there are people in who's company you get educated. Jack (and I was specifically informed that he was Jack, not Mr, Dr or Professor Cohen) is firmly in the third group. The line *Put it in the microwave, it will warm it up. Trust me, I'm a physicist* is one that I will dine out with for possibly the rest of my life.

From there I met MEG. Now, some of you again may know that our one-time Con chairman is a little poorly. However, she's here in the dealer room, and in the bar, and enjoying the con. She is also one of my dearest friends. Someone I see so seldom that when we *do* meet we tend to talk. Sadly she also brought her husband....and *he* is possibly my favourite raconteur. And there went the evening. Tim finally retired to bed, and MEG said she'd follow when she finished her wine...

At 4am we left the Hedgehog Party, MEG having boogied and chatted and, I am pleased to report, had a whale of a time. If she's reading this I'd like to thank her for looking after me so well.

So...Discworld conventions. The people are fabulous to a man, woman, child and small radio-controlled luggage. Multi-talented and affable, drunk and sober. You will be drawn in to a circle of old friends you've never met before, and really old friends you talk to all the time. You will be entertained and educated, you will in turn educate and entertain. You may dance and sing, play instruments or sit on the sideline. You may dress up. You may dress down. You may forget to dress at all. You will, however, have a great time. You can't help it.

And there are still two days to go!

Sunday 29 August 2010

Death is a Woman

By Zetty Abbott

On my first day here I went right to registration like a good little newbie and was told  I was entitled to take two Discworld books.  They were in different languages and it got me thinking about translation and whether non-English speakers read in their native language or in English.

I spoke with people here from Germany, Denmark, Belgium and Spain and heard some interesting things.  In Spanish the concept of Death is feminine so in the early books Death was a woman, until Reaper Man, when that got changed.  Apparently the later translations are improving and this is because the Spanish publishers have hired the person who runs the Discworld fan website to assist or supervisor the new translations and the fans are able to put in their two bits as well.  It's a testament to the devotion of the fans and a smart move on the part of the publishers.

In German a trunk is called Truhe and is a feminine noun but I think we know our Discworld Luggage is male.  Nothing that destructive could be female, except maybe in Greek mythology.  So in the German versions of the book the definite article is avoided and the noun becomes a proper name.  Gee, that seems familiar.

I had heard that the Dutch translator has won awards for his work but the one Dutchman I met reads the books in English.

I myself  picked up a French version of The Light Fantastic and a Greek version of Wyrd Sisters.  The latter goes to my aunt who gave my Winnie-the-Pooh in Latin when I was ten years old.

It's clear that there are fans everywhere in Roundworld and even better that we all get to meet at conventions like this one.  I look forward to coming back to this magical world.

Elves – nasty or nice? A lecture by Jacqueline Simpson

By Jessica Yates


Just after Dr. Simpson began lecturing to over 200 fans, her discourse was interrupted by the Queen of the Fairies, who “froze” her, then announced that she had heard a human was discussing Elves and would be keeping a close eye on the proceedings. Now she would take the spell off our lecturer – and watch from the back.

Jacqueline recovered from her dizzy spell and continued her lecture, speaking mainly by heart with readings from her booklet which contained an expanded version of the talk (just published by Bernard, with a foreword by Terry Pratchett, it is now available in the Dealers’ Room.

Near the end of the fascinating lecture, which there is no need to summarise, the Fairy Queen (Periwinkle) returned and went on the attack, but Jacqueline boldly brandished a silver poker and forced her to retreat!

Maskerade!

by Jessica Yates

Pat was our compère for the second time, and as we learned, had also done the commentary for the North American Discworld Convention.

After a pep talk punctuated by quacking (a traditional heckle begun in 2008) the show began! To the music of Carl Orff’s O Fortuna the professional judging panel paraded: Terry! Brian! Jacqueline! Bernard!
Then came the maskeraders to strut their stuff. All were distinctive, covered a range of Discworld characters and were enthusiastically applauded. In my humble opinion Glenda Sugarbean advising on make-up for trolls delivered an excellent patter, and another lady presenting the Goddes of Lightning to the music of Night on a Bare mountain had a fabulous costume and speech. The “Going Mental” undercover assassins had a fine concept and so did the unseen university cheerleader.

Part-way through, the performance of “Death of Sheep” added baa-ing to the heckling, but Pat kept his cool! During the interval Pat interviewed the seven candidates for Low King – another unique piece of role-play.


The results:

Special award for Best Surprise: PoohCarrot – as Lu-Tze

Junior award: Bridget Hurtebise – as Concussia, goddess of not paying attention in P.E.

Rookie category award: “No you can’t” - Gill Bowler and Ann Thorold as priest and acolyte of Nuggan

Novice category award: “A girl in wolf’s clothing” – Liz McMichael

Journeyman category award: Brian Date – as Lord Vetinari

Master category award: Richard Artley – as Sir Joshua Lavish

Best in Show award went to Jan Uzzell who performed the Departure Aria “Questa Maladetta” from Maskerade, and Min Lacey as Welter Plinge who held up the captions “This damn door sticks” etc. Jan wore a gigantic looped skirt, sang beautifully and agreed to encore it after her award.

We must also thank Pam Hicks, Maskerade organiser.

The Man in the Hat

By Jessica Yates

Terry, later joined by Stephen Baxter, was interviewed by Brian with some questions submitted by the members.

Q: Why does Ankh-Morpork have dollars and not pounds?
A: Many countries use or have used dollars – pounds are too English. Mark Twain introduced dollars in Connecticut Yankee – most people know the film not the book – TP praised the book highly for its exploration the too sudden introduction of technology into a medieval culture.

Q: We heard the extract from Snuff. Country versus city – which are you?
A: My ideal is to be a country man living just beyond easy reach to a city. Cities are where civilization comes from.
He then talked about the freedom of the individual, “your house is your castle” and so on.

The talk then moved to Terry’s sword.
Q: Does it have a name?
A: Albion, and I’m going to get Lionel to christen it.
They talked about the remote possibility of using a sword for a zombie Apocalypse.

TP said that he was not the Discworld chronicler, for example he didn’t know what was happening to Rincewind. Snuff or Midnight reference some of the same places. the important thing is to get the book started.

In answer to a question about why he didn’t save his drafts for literary researchers, unlike other writers, he said he didn’t see it as his job, the finished book was what mattered.

Stephen Baxter came on stage and we were treated to a semi-private conversation in which he and Terry batted ideas about the Long Earth project back and forth. Much needs to be developed before they can start. terry wanted Stephen on board because he wanted science and science fiction but no magic.

With reference to the collaboration Stephen said that to work with Terry was like jamming with Paul McCartney.

Church of Om

by Jessica Yates


This ever-popular event was supervised by Lionel and Mole under their Omnian soubriquets and was so well attended the leaflets ran out (and could not be caught – sorry!).

After Mole’s introduction explaining why the Church had sent him to preach in Bonk (you had to be there!) we sang the usual hymn “Om is trampling the unrighteous”. Lionel performed the (real and sincere) Blessing of Sister Periwinkle and Brother Butcher. We accepted our theological instruction and heard the parish notices, especially tailored for Bonk, such as Count von Sturmunddrang invites young ladies to meet for the embroidery circle at midnight – virgins only.
There would be a werewolf awareness meeting, Igor’s Bring and Buy Sale, and the Dwarf Outreach Group had organised a Dwarf speed-dating event – wear leather gear and hoods.
Our final hymn was based on Abide with me, emended to request Om to shield us from vampires and werewolves.

The service was held in the presence of a very fine image of Om, with the guest appearance of Offler and the goddess Libertina and as always, contained a genuine spiritual and ecumenical uplift.

Thanks to Mole for planning the service and organising the A3 leaflets, and Lionel for co-officiating, and Sister torture on the organ.


Going Postal in Technicolor: Behind the scenes of Going Postal with Ian Sharples from Mob Films

By Jessica Yates

Going Postal was filmed in Budapest, Hungary because it was cheaper and the city had a fantastic architecture which fitted Ankh-Morpork. There was a good local tech, the crew had already shot Eragon and Robin Hood for example. The studio already has a fantastic back lot to which they added new sets. They were in regular contact with Terry over the set design.

We were shown drawings of clacks towers and an operator, and photos of the constructing the clacks towers.

The background folk all read the book as well as the script to get the art direction right. We then saw stills interspersed with short videos.

Terry entered and opened the theme of what the next Discworld movie is going to be. Currently it is rumoured to be Sourcery, but there’s a change of heart, going with the cast we have, e.g. Vetinari, Ridcully...
A cast with lots of spectators. Is it going to be the Wee Free Men? But Terry had a football-like ball on the table...

TP complimented Mob on doing Discworld as Discworld should be done. “We know where to get the best extras” he added.
As it’s difficult to get audience on Sky at Christmastime, the next possible showing time is Easter 2012 – that means filming in 2011.

After watching the scene with Moist on the horse, the session closed with a showing of the hilarious DVD extra “Return to Sender”.

So it will be Unseen Academicals – you heard it first!




And so it begins:-

by GazHunter
The tweet, from our steamed Vice Chair read So, the day dawns on #dwcon set-up. Now: coffee and Internets. Soon: get up, shower, breakfast. Then: hunt gophers to unload car.

Well. I am HuntGopher, so clearly this was addressed to me, and as I was about 1/2 hour away by car, and I had planned to Goph...what was a man to do? Casting caution, pyjamas and 2 days growth of beard to the wind I decided to goph forth, then went back, got dressed and went forth again

My timing was perfect. I arrived just in time for the Vice Chair to have almost emptied his car, so had but a small box to take to Ops, a duty I performed with skill and dexterity, and only got lost the once. Once there I quickly signed up as Gopher and suchlike, and after a quick round of musical tables, musical boxes, musical stationary and musical printers, as Ops was transformed from a base, characterless hotel room into a magical fairy grotto [1] my co-gophers and I were herded, cat-like, onto our first mission-critical job. Envelope-stuffing. There are 900 of you. Each have an envelope with *stuff* in it. These are not magical self-stuffing envelopes. 4500 money notes, 1800 sheets of guild appreciation tokens and a sticky label were adhered and stuffed in and on the blessed things. By hand. Now...you may like to try this at home. Count out 600 lots of 2 sheets of paper, one after the other. Then change to counting out lots of 5 sheets. Your brain will rebel, and you will fail to remember how to count to five...

Ops opened, and I wandered, heading for the bar, and coffee. And a wireless connection for the laptop. I geeked, and people happened. Music was played. And then The Management turned up and forbade the playing of musical instruments because of Licencing Laws. Which is really annoying. Part of the 'con tradition is playing and group song-murdering in the bar. This year it seems this is not to be...

I was called upon to move a load of boxes from a van to Ops. Then having just bought a coffee I was called upon again to move some boxes from Sator Square to Lord-Knows Where. Then, just as the coffee cup reached my lips I was called again to move some more boxes. Hypothetical, metaphysical boxes. When I arrived the boxes were gone. Not there. Having no physical existance. So I went back to my coffee. At the point the cup touched my lips the boxes, out of sheer spite, recorporialised, and off I went to Registration with them, wherein I was caught in a weird dance...collect a bag, proceed down the table adding a pen, a balloon, a notepad, a magazine, a lanyard, a bookmark...all done, amidst many MANY more people, and set, weirdly, to music. At which point my caffeine-starved braincells rebelled, and forced me back to reclaim my now cold beverage...

Once again many wonderful people were arriving, and before many minutes a group of strangers became old friends. Rolf and Uwe, Bjorn, Edmund, Suzi, Gid, Eric, old friends all, mixed and chatted with new faces, people I have never met yet through the magic of Discworld have known all my life. The conversation flowed from Henry VIII to Edward I, lyrical poetry through the age, erotic symbolism in Warehouse 13 and Eureka...yes, this was a Convention.

Sadly I'd forgotten that I was merely mortal. Worse, I am having to rely more and more on Pharmaceuticals to keep bits from dropping off. And in my hurry to renew old friendships and forge new ones I'd managed to leave the most important ones behind, so had to flee before the pub quiz. Again...

However, energy and Miscelaneous deities willing, tomorrow is another day. See you there!

[1] I hadn't had much coffee, and they had My Little Ponies[2]. That's close enough...
[2] Don't ask, okay? Just don't ask!

Musings

by Gaz Hunter
It exists in the head of a child in Mumbai. it exists in the head of an old man in Anuppur.
In Nyíregyháza it is being constructed, the building blocks of words placed brick by brick on the foundations of a fertile imagination. In Evandale and Blagoveshchensk, Baltimore and Phuthaditjhaba its geography is firmly established in the minds and hearts of readers. Yet were you to ask your GPS, your TOMTOM or Garmin to take you there it would fail. No such place exists.

And yet...

 In 1983 a most extraordinary man with the power to turn sentences into space, words into worlds, paragraphs into people and places wrote *The Colour of Magic* . Just a book. Just an idea. Yet in 27 years the book, and its 36 sequels have reached across the world. Translated into numerous languages, made into audiobooks, films, radio plays, comics, they have actively touched the lives of millions, drawing them into a world-wide web of Discworld fandom. You are reading this now because a man with a hat and a love of carnivorous plants put down his fork 27 years ago and thought *Ooh, that's an idea!* In the hands of most writers the idea could have worked, it could have been a bit of a giggle, it may have sold quite well.

And yet...

I'm sure that when Rincewind and Twoflower caused the first insurance fraud that nearly wiped out Ankh Morpork Terry had no idea of the uniting influence his words would have. it was an amusing idea that might have legs.

And yet...

The Dysk. Sator Square. Biers, Ankh, Morpork. Not real. We all know them because of The Books. They exist in our heads, because we know the geography of this ridiculous place, The Discworld. A flat world, perched preposterously on Pachyderms, carried on  a chitinous Chelonian carapace. How on earth could this be real?

And yet...

People have drawn maps so we can identify and locate with absolute precision somewhere that cannot possibly occupy the same physical space as ourselves. Ankh Morpork is no more real than Utopia or Atlantis, yet because you are reading this you *know* that is is a citly bisected by a river that can, in the summer, be ploughed. You know that at its head is the One Man with One Vote. However, you also know, in your head, that these places, these names exist only between the pages of a book, and in the heads of millions of people. They have no physical presence. Nobody in their right mind would tell you otherwise.

And yet...

Yesterday I went to The Dysk. Really, I did! I visited Biers and The Pit. I carried boxes from Lancre Forge to The Odium. I poked my head into Harga's House of Ribs and peeped into Ankh Morpork. Because whilst Terry's mind made theses places in the imagination, the magic that his words wove, the joy that they brought and continue to bring has had the most amazing effect. It brought together like minded people from around the globe. It united us. The Colour of Magic is real. It consists of the Black of a hat, the silver of a beard, the sparkle of eyes and the smile of real pleasure. And it is this magic that has caused a Hotel in Birmingham to become, just briefly, the REAL Discworld.

And yet...

The power of the mind is incredible. But, we are many. We, the fans, created a real Discworld. In our hearts, in our heads, in a Hotel in Birmingham. Maybe, just maybe, we created Terry as well...

Worbelook is in hospital

Jean Guittet (Worbelook) was taken to hospital yesterday with a chest infection. The hospital kept him overnight, and at the time of writing, he was still in hospital.
Worbelook is a French member of the convention, and a frequent poster on the Discworld stamp forum.
Araby has a get-well card that people can sign - see him if you would like to be part of the well-wishing for this member of the convention.

Choice morsels from the “Man with no hat” interview

by Elias Helfer
Displaying a noticeable lack of male figures in headwear, this year’s Guest of Honor interview failed miserably to live up to its name: “The Man with the Hat.” Chairman Brian Nisbet interviewed Terry on subjects ranging from how to come up with names to the possible future of Tiffany Aching, before bringing Stephen Baxter on stage to discuss Terry’s and his coming collaboration, The Long Earth.


Why Dollars?
The first question dealt with the currency of the Disc: why did Terry choose to name the Ankh Morpork currency Dollars instead of pounds?
To this, Terry countered that there are more countries in the world using dollars than pounds, going into the origins of the word dollar from the original word “Joachimsthaler.” Apart from that, he wanted to mix things up a little, not making things too British.
“Besides, they have pennies instead of cents.”

The poor literary historians…
Brian then quoted Terry saying how he saved a number of drafts on his computer, then, when the book was done, shouting “Get a real job, literary historians of the future,” deleting everything but the finished thing. One literary historian had handed in a question citing this quote, adding: “Why?”
Terry quibbed that he’d inherited a certain disregard for literary historians from his father. Though the quote was also made in a time where the technical realities were quite different.
“Back then, I saved my files on floppy discs that were actually floppy,” Terry remembers.
“Nowadays, each new computer has more capacity than all the computers I had before it put together.”
Back then, the limited storage space necessitated weeding out excess files ever so often. Nowadays, saving every draft of a book barely makes a dent in the available space on the hard drive. That means that nowadays, a lot more gets saved.
 But that doesn’t mean that Terry would be happy to let people delve into his drafts.
“It’s about craftsmanship.”
And just as a master swordsmith throws away the shards and ashes that have gone into the crafting of a fine swords, the drafts that Terry make are just tools used in the process of writing the book.
“The book that is printed is the book I wanted to write. The rest is just steps on the way.”

Coming up with names
One congoer had wanted to know how Terry comes up with names. In many different ways, it turned out.
One good source is lists of old names
“It’s amazing how few names I actually have to come up with.”
Other names come to more as a matter of inspiration – like Bestiality Carter
“It occurred to me, that if people name their daughters after virtues, they might name their boys after sins. Some people might actually do that.”
Other names have no basis in anything in Roundworld.
“When coming up for the name for Angua, I was just playing around with sounds,” Terry recalls.
Sometimes, of course, a name proves to have unanticipated connotations.
“When I came up with Tiffany Aching, I wanted a name that didn’t sound anything like the name of a witch. Which is a bit ironic, since the name Tiffany comes from the word ‘epiphany.’”
Tifffany also proves the difficulties involved in translating books:
“I know that in some other languages, Tiffany is used to refer to either hairdressers, or women who you bring with you to your hotel room at night.”

I Shall Wear Midnight
On the topic of Tiffany, Brian and Terry continued on to talk about the book I shall wear midnight, which is set to release this coming Wednesday at midnight (when else?).
Terry explained that one American fan of The Boy That We Shan’t Mention had seen the Tiffany books as an attack on J.K. Rowling’s books.
“Which is ridiculous, since Granny were saying those things all the way back in Equal Rites,” Terry exclaimed
“The thing is, magic is hard. And it isn’t sparkly. The only thing you’re allowed – your only right – is your broomstick.”
Terry went on to say that a life as a witch was not glamorous, but rather very hard work.
“It’s a tough life with only a few satisfactions.”
Being a witch is “a dirty job, doing the things society needs someone to do.”

Stephen Baxter and the Long Earth
After talking to Terry alone for some 45 minutes, Brian called Stephen Baxter up to join them on the stage.
First they talked discussed how Terry had gotten into writing fantasy.
“I’ve done two not very good sci-fi novels,” Terry started.
After that, Terry wrote The Colour of Magic and The Light Fantastic as a spoof of bad copies of Tolkien.
"I thought: let’s treat all these creatures as if they were real people. Now real people are sometime being rational, sometimes being stupid.”
Then, around the time of Equal Rites, Terry found that the Discworld had started making him money. And so, one book took another, and he never returned to sci-fi.
The idea that lead to The Long Earth came to Terry around this time. Seeing a man seemingly pushing a horse into a pub, he started imagining a man who found an entire world, devoid of human life, the man taking livestock etc. with him to this world to live.
This evolved into the basic idea for The Long Earth: What if mankind found a way to go to all the earths that could have been – and found that only one of them contained Homo sapiens? Suddenly, scarcity of land would not be a problem – every man could get a galaxy of earths to himself!
Of course, the fact that the other worlds contain no human life doesn’t mean they provide no obstacles to human settlement. First of all, with no human civilization, most of the earth will be covered in woods. So provided the explorers manage to avoid materializing inside a tree, they will be in the middle of acres and acres of forest with a visibility of 15 feet. Secondly, “no humans” doesn’t mean “no threatening creatures,” or indeed, “no intelligent life” (Terry and Stephen were trying to keep quiet about much of the plot of the book, but some things were hinted at).
Another thing that was implied was that there will be at least two strands in the story: the story of someone who goes down the line of the many different Earths, going out to explore alone – and the story of those who stay behind, suddenly finding a world being left behind by everyone else. The phrase used was something of the lines of: “What would happen to the ruling classes if all the workers suddenly disappeared?”
Without promising anything, the two authors indicated that there might well be one or more sequels to The Long Earth, Terry saying that he had a perfect title for the final book set in the world.
Brian ended the interview by asking the authors what they’d say to, say, Discworld fans who were worried about Terry writing a sci-fi book. Stephen answered by saying that “this is Terry going back to his roots!”
Terry followed up on that saying that when writing in the real world, you must follow the rules of the real world, and those rules include science – so it helps to have someone who understands science. But when writing Discworlds, there are rules to follow just the same – only difference is, that those rules were set up by Terry.
And with that, Brian ended the interview, commenting that if one of his guests had run as much over time as he had, he would have been angry with them.

Scandal: Granny Weatherwax Sleeps with Lord Vetinari


By Clerk Domino

Yes, the all powerful Tyrant of Ankh-Morpork has been rumoured for many years not to be entirely human and our reporter can confirm that Granny Weatherwax sleeps with a plushy doll of the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork.

As you can see, the attached iconography proves that Weatherwax, highly esteemed Ramtops Witch, sleeps with Lord Vetinari (the identity of the bear under her other arm is not known).

How the disclosure of this shocking relationship between the all powerful Tyrant and the all powerful Witch will affect how Ankh-Morpork citizens view their ruler, we can only speculate.  When asked for more details of the relationship the Patrician’s assistant, Drumknott seccy PP, refused to comment.

It is well known that Weatherwax does not give interviews, and as this reporter does not wish to be turned into a frog, I did not press the matter.

Has Weatherwax used headology or witch wisdom on Vetinari?  We can only wonder, but Vetinari is the longest serving Patrician of Ankh-Morpork in recent history, what is the secret of his longevity?  We look forward to developments.

The Opening Ceremony

By Jessica Yates
The ceremony opened with an evocation of the “knockermen” tradition of the dwarf mines. A knockerman in his working uniform made his way through the fog as the story was told.
Then with a crash, bang and aspotlight, on came Terry, wielding a large sword. “I am so angry! Stephen Briggs has got Inigo Montoya’s sword! Well, I have the Sword of Death!
This is the 7th Discworld Convention!
Journalists say we are a bunch of weirdos – yes we are!
Thank you for your fanmail about my health – it’s OK at the moment.”

Terry praised the new software which allows him to dictate his books with Rob’s help. He has the only computer which can say Crivens! and have a Nac Mac Feegle vocabulary.

“I’ve done 20,000 words in the last few weeks, and if it wasn’t for me having to waste my time with you lot...
There is a streak of madness in the British monarchy – I was tapped on the shoulder by the Queen. I think she said, “Can we have another one with Rincewind in it?”

Terry has made himself a real sword – with help – from digging out the iron ore, smelting, to the finish. Didn’t bring it along though – could have been done for “knife crime”.

He hoped his dad and granddad are proud to see him a knight, he knows they would have been proud he is a millionaire.
“A knighthood is worth nothing and everything – it’s a pass to start speaking up and making a nuisance of yourself. You can bully the bullies.”

His diagnosis 3 years ago has led him to a different kind of life – hopes to meet all (!) of us this weekend. (Prolonged applause).

Brian then came on to do the boring stuff.

Granny Shocks!

by Nitta

At the opening ceremony of the Discworld Convention 2010 Mistress Weatherwax was reportedly seen taking a seat in the middle of the ceremony hall, then looking around and taking her hat off (unasked) – revealing a small white kitten underneath. What might she be up to?

Interview with Stephen Baxter

by Jessica Yates
Stephen Baxter is one of Britain’s leading novelists of hard SF, and also a veteran conventioneer. Having previously collaborated with Arthur C. Clarke, and being a long-term professional colleague of Terry’s, he developed an interest in Terry’s unpublished writings of the Long Earth (see Convention souvenir book page 23). The pair have now announced they will collaborate on at least two novels to open the series.
This is not about alternative worlds where human history has run a different course, it’s about exploring Earth-type worlds where no humans have evolved. (For example, Britain would be one big forest.)

Mr. Baxter had read many, but not all Discworld books, and among his favourites are Mort, Monstrous Regiment and Feet of Clay. He feels that although they write in different genres, they have plenty in common under the surface to do with the serious purpose of their work.

Would Baxter be fazed by the large number of fans in costume? Not at all, he enjoys the spectacle, and has also attended Fanderson conventions!

As a member of the Guild of Journalists, Stephen Baxter, welcome to Discworld!

Terry and Rob’s Bedtime Stories

by Jessica Yates
First Roba came on, and after some jokes, Terry came on and Robe proposed to read from I Shall Wear Midnight. Terry objected to Rob doing the Feegles – he couldn’t get the accent right. So Rob put away his proof copy of Midnight, and produced a typescript of Snuff – work in progress. (Applause!)

Since nearly everyone at the Convention was at the Dysk, I need not tell you whar we heard, but for those who weren’t we shall meet a newish species and explore a new part of Discworld. Oh – and it’s about Vimes – and Vetinari makes an appearance.

Thanks to Terry for sharing his draft with us, and to Rob for reading it.

Simpson debates the role of fairies

by Cheresse
Jacqueline Simpson risked the wrath  of the Queen of the Fairies at 12:00 Saturday afternoon with a bold dive into the history of Man's interaction with the Lords and Ladies, and the differing interpretations of elves and their actions.

Pat Harkins is reporting from the convention

In this day and age, it can come as no surprise that the Chronicle Live is not the only place you can go to read reports on all the things that are going on at the convention. And whenever we find someone, we shall point you to them, so you can read about the con to your heart's content.
One of the people writing about the con is Pat Harkin.. no, not that Pat Harkin, it's his son [QUACK].
At the time of writing, he's posted two items, the fist being a quick report on Terry's cooperation with Stephen Baxter, the second being a non-report of no non-items concerning Discworld films that Pat never heard at a klatch he didn't attend. No interesting rumours there, I'm afraid.

An Audience with Stephen Briggs

By Jessica Yates
The room was nearly full, and Stephen opened by wondering if he’d come to the right place!

He announced he wouldn’t make a speech, he’d turn the session into a giant Q&A Klatch.
Before he started he showed us a wonderful replica sword, which had come into his possession via his am-dram connections and had originally been a rehearsal sword for The Princess Bride, which he had hoped to adapt for the stage. He draw it and posed as Inigo Montoya with “Hello!” (murmurs of admiration)

The Qs and As began with “Will you marry my mum?”
A: I’m here on my partner’s birthday, every 2 years it clashes with Discworld.

Q: When you read a new Terry Pratchett novel, do you lose yourself into the story or do you think about adapting it straight away?
A: Yes, I start thinking about the play from the outset. A book can change a lot from first idea to publication. The football game in Unseen Academicals was a problem, but most games in drama are off-stage anyway.
The the National Theatre staged Nation, and he saw how the professionals adapted Terry’s work – even more than he does. He saw the cinema version in Oxford and noted big changes.

Q: Is your favourite book the same as your favourite play?
A: Recently we redid Wyrd Sisters which was very well on stage. Mort is my favourite book – it got me into Discworld. It’s where Terry moved from parody into creating his world.

Q: Why don’t we see you on Sky1 as Vetinari?
A: Not for want of asking – a long story but they had decided to go for professional and well-known actors – Charles Dance especially – “out of my league”.
Comment: “Maybe they’ll run out of other people to ask!”
SB: I am on the Colour of Magic DVD as an extra.

Q: What’s it like to play Vetinari?
A: I like it – I wear black, I know everything. It’s been a weird journey. He started out not looking like me, and now he does. I had Ian Richardson in House of Cards in mind – Terry thought the guy who played the villain in Die Hard – he had a beard so I grew one. [that’s Alan Rickman, JY]. Also, TP suggested an Elizabethan feel, Blackadder 2, SB felt like the Cardinal in Amadeus.

Q: What are you doing now?
A: TP’s new books coming out more slowly so I am redoing his canon. Planning to redo Carpe Jugulum, but this November doing Shakespeare’s Dream.

Q: Have you any tips for adapters?
A: Be prepared to throw away stuff you really like.

Q: What scene do you regret dumping most?
A: I cut Death out of Wyrd Sisters first time, second time – he still didn’t fit, he shows up too late. In general, concepts rather than technicalities (e.g. Thief of Time) make it harder to stage some novels. Effects can be done with imagination.

Finally he talked about reading Terry’s books for audio CDs, which he does for American and British companies. The Nac Mac Feegles are hard to differentiate. He is about to read I Shall Wear Midnight – twice!

Juicy tidbits of gossip

The Gossipmongering part (Wolffie, with a helping hand from Nitta) of the Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers have been out digging up some juicy tidbits of gossip, which we bring here for your reading pleasure.

Interview with Al from the Watch

by Nitta
You remind me of Officer Gotcha from Jamie and the Magic Torch. Where does the idea to wear a helmet* comes from? 
- It started about 4 or 5 Cons ago: I signed up for the Watch then. Next time I came up with the squeaky truncheon, and then next time again with a policeman’s helmet. At the 2008 con I had a flashing light fitted on it and then I thought this time I’d come up with something more silly, so I put a siren on it – it’s actually meant for bicycles. It seems to amuse peple – and that’s the main thing.

Which was the firs convention you went to?
- It was about 13 years ago – at that time not all of them were called cons, there were some yearly events as well, more like big camping events. I’ve been doing the Watch for a couple of cons, and when 2 years ago Dónal couldn’t do it I joined in as Commander of the Watch with Gabe.

Who’s your favourite character on the Discworld?
- That’s a tricky one. Probably Archchancellor Ridcully.

And here the interview ended as Terry’s Saturday booksigning began, and the Watch had a lot to do all at once.

*: Editor's note: Al had, as official watch head-wear acquired a "Bobby" style helmet with a loudspeaker on top, permitting him to sound a divers number of alarums. We were all terribly amused.

Mystick Minnie's Houriscopes for Saturday, August 28

PROBOSCIS, the Anteater: you will experience a deep sense of dread and foreboding just before opening your closet. It's probably nothing.
AMBIGUA, the drag queen: the Moon is ascending in your Cusp of Qualor, but it's just being friendly. The lid on your jar of jam will be unusually stiff. Hit it with a knife handle.
TRIANGULUM, the triangle: Extra cash brings bad luck. Buy your nearest astrologer a pint to restore your spiritual balance.
FLEDERMUS FRUCTOSE, the Fruitbat: You are invincible. Nothing can stop you. All undertakings begun today will meet with guaranteed 100% success. Want proof? Jump in front of a rolling cart!
DENARIUS, the Lawmaker: Find a Canis Calientus and stand behind them while grinning unnervingly. Guaranteed laughs.
TRIANGULUM ALTERNIMUS, the other triangle: the eye is the window of the soul. Consider getting new curtains.
EPHEBORASTOS, the Priest: the Sun in opposition to A'tuin's left eye drives change. Begin a new relationship today. Him over there, he'll do.
CANIS CALIENTUS, the Sausage: Look behind you.
ARENA LAMIA, the Sandwich: worrying about the End Times so much won't make them come any later, or for that matter any sooner. Enjoy your life even though your days are numbered...very numbered.
HABEAS CORPUS, the Igor: exthpect the unexthpected. Give yourthelf the chanthe you detherve and you will thuctheed on your own meritth. Your employer'th lothth ith your gain!
TRIANGULUM ALTERNISSIMUS, the other other triangle: Nox descending in trine with the Black Sun leaving the cusp of Io's sceptre trailing a blessed reverse syzygy. Hope that clears things up!
VISITOR CONFUSUS, the Perplexed Guest: Go to Ops.
IF TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY: nobody knows what you did last year, don't worry. Double check that all the evidence is well hidden and do your best to carry on as normal. Sheep cannot legally be called to testify, except in Llamedos.

Saturday 28 August 2010

The entries of the Masquerade

It is currently halftime in the Masquerade. Below follows some notes on all the entries. They are not spell checked, not read through, many of the names are missing or wrong - in short, I have been writing as the Masquerade unfolded, and now, I am posting it in halftime. Results, and report from interviews for Low King, will follow later.
I may correct this mess later, but no promises.

Morris Dancing

Written by Darrock
Jumping about, waving and bashing sticks together. Certainly not the sort of activity that a wizard should be involved in. However, in order to keep up my disguise, I was forced into attending this most bizarre of events so that my daughter could enjoy herself.

Chronicles of Darrock - Day 1

I have successfully infiltrated the guild with the able assistance of my wife and children. They suspect nothing! We had a meeting, during which it was suggested that we should supply “love” to the people and that the people would then provide us with recompense... This seems like a very odd arrangement to me. In Ankh, if you provide someone with something and ask for a “voluntary donation” they’ll take what you give ‘em and run for the hills (well, the Shades anyway).
As for this “love” thing, it does not seem to have much to do with darning socks... Some of the others did mention corsetry and offering assistance to those finding this item of clothing difficult. This seems like much firmer territory and I offered to assist, although the offer was turned down for some reason (they obviously do not believe that I am sufficiently high ranking in the guild).
Since then, I have tried to follow the guidance of the guild as allowed, providing hugs to tired denizens when requested and generally spreading the message of love (very reasonably priced apparently) to one and all.
Tomorrow, I hope to find out more about the dubious activities going on and discover the secret of how they have managed to infiltrate the area so completely. I will have to sacrifice myself to the cause in the hopes of getting away from all this quicker.

Signed,

Darrock (Guild of Seamstresses)

Chronicles of Darrock - The Assignment

Have you ever had one of those days where your world hangs in the balance and you’re not sure whether anything will be the same again? Yes? Me too.
I have been on an investigative trip into the Roundworld for the UU. The place is... weird. Anyway, the other day, I got pulled out of the Roundworld and to my surprise was sent to see the Archchancellor. He offered me a “rare opportunity” and the “chance of a lifetime”. I was, of course, suspicious, but refusing the Archchancellor might lead to “words”.
My “opportunity” was that the Seamstresses were active in elsewhere in the world (no point in trying to get into the Seamstresses in Ankh, they know all the wizards anyway) and the Archchancellor was very keen that I should discover what they actually did. He had heard rumours that darning socks was not their only service.
Anyway, after some travelling and a cunning disguise (the Archchancellor even changed my hat!) I have managed to infiltrate the guild and am now in a unique position to report on activities back to UU.
As such, I will be writing pieces for the Chronicle with the intention of providing much needed information to the Archchancellor on these activities. With any luck, I can obtain enough to satisfy the Archchancellor and return to UU (and my fellow students) soon.

Signed,

Darrock (Guild of Seamstresses)

Babies at the Con

Terry posing alongside a junior member of the con. Where the baby came from, we don't know.

I have never been to a convention for Discworld or any other world for that matter. Neither have 50% of the other attendees. Fifty percent is pretty significant. Why so many newbies? Well I did a little looking around and a fair few of these are in nappies; with one notable exception they don't have hair on their backs. In the under 2 set there is a 16 month old, a 15 month old one who is 4 ½ months old, 3 months and I think the youngest is 5 weeks. So, there are people at the convention who weren't even born when the planning stages were started.
They aren't in fancy costumes but get loads of attention. I doubt many of them have read the books. They seem to be having as much fun as the rest of us though they are managing to have naps.   

/Zetty Abbott

The Honourable Company supports Jennifer Delaney for Low King!

The Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers is, of course, taking the upcoming election for Low King very seriously. Who sits on the Scone has wide implications for all of us in the short term as well as in the long perspective. The Company has been evaluating the candidates for a considerable period and has made its decision. We need a strong Low King, we need a firm Low King, and above all, we need a media-friendly Low King. A free and unintimidated press is essential for Uberwald.

The Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers is delighted to announce that it endorses the candidacy of Jennifer Delaney (A89) as Low King. Jennifer Delaney is a dwarf of many years' stooping with a long and proud record of serving the mines in many capacities. We believe that Jennifer Delaney is the best dwarf for the role of Low King. If Jennifer Delaney is elected, there will be more gold for all dwarves and we will get the answers to the pub quiz in two years' time!

As for the other candidates, we have heard some sad tales. Our crack team of investigative journalists is still investigating, and we are gathering evidence of shameful scandals. Rumour has it that at least one candidate is not a dwarf and that some may even be female and proud of it. Rest assured that we will do our utmost to keep you updated on these shocking revelations.

Remember, in the election for the Low King, vote Jennifer Delaney (A89) – high standards for the Low King!

On behalf of the Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers,

Elias Helfer, Deputy.

The Officially-Non-Official Pub Quizz

On Thursday evening, the con didn't start with the traditional, not-at-all part of the convention pub quizz hosted and designed by Jennifer Delaney. The quizz featured 32 Roundworld related questions, each loosely based on a Discworld book. For those of you who weren't there, we bring here the questions, including the book it was based upon, the number of points the question potentially provides and, last but certainly not least, the answer, appearing in white after the question (highlight it to see the answer).

If you're lucky, you get to take Nanny Ogg home with you...

...cause Nanny has become a painted lady... made of lead:

Becky of Ecclectic Games is raffling off an expertly hand-crafted miniature Nanny Ogg figurine for charity - see the Ecclectic Games stall for details and raffle tickets. Tickets will be available until shortly before the Dealer's room closes on Monday.

Tuesday 24 August 2010

Have you got news for us?

Welcome to The Chronicle Live. This is the journal we produced day by day not just for the inmates^Wmembers but also to share the event with our fellow fans stuck outside in the
Roundworld as well as to enjoy as part of the retrospective.

This year, the chair of the Editor in Chief of this glorious news medium has been taken over by us, the deputies of The Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers (luckily, the chair is quite wide, so we're not too squished).

THIS SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN TO MEAN THAT WE ONLY WANT GUILD MEMBERS WRITING FOR IT!

Quite the contrary, in fact. We want as many conventioneers as possible to take part. And we eagerly accept any and all kinds of contributions[1]: text, pictures, videos, sound recordings... we want it all!
So if too few people were at that amazingly interesting panel you were at, or if something mindblowingly astonishing happened on your way to Terry's Bedtime Story? Write a piece about it and let everybody know!

Don't have an electronic device on which to write your piece? Borrow one from us, or write your piece on paper - we'll type it up (within reason; no three part novels).
Have an urge to write, but no ideas? Come see us - we're bound to have ideas for things you can write!
Have an idea for what you want to read, but no time to write it? Swing by to tell us, and we'll see if we can find someone else who wants to write it.
Want to help out, but don't want to write anything? Swing by, and you can help us type up, edit, or otherwise make the operation run smoothly.
Good at layout? Come and help select pieces for printing up to the noticeboards!

We hope many of you will provide us with material to publish, and that all of you will enjoy this years' Chronicle Live,

Otto and Elias (eds.)

[1] That we can legally and technically publish on the blog. Sorry, no
"interesting" anatomical sculptures.
An Introduction to the Guilds of the 2010 Convention.

A number of Ankh-Morpork's Guilds, both great and small, are present in Bonk for the delegation; where they are to be welcomed by a number of Bonk's own local associations.

They are:

From Ankh-Morpork:

• The Guild of Assassins
• The Guild of Seamstresses
• The Honorable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and Gossipmongers
• The Guild of Historians, Teachers and Archaeological Knowitalls

From Bonk:

• The Reformed Athothiation of Thurgeonth, Igorth and Igorinath
• The Missionaries, Proselytes and Botherers of Om
• The Überwald League of Temperance
There is also a (non-competitive) Guild for people who have a yearning to display their skills at performing:
• The Bonk Operatic Society (twinned with the Dolly Sisters Players).
Between them, they possess a power for chaos, mayhem and (we hope) a very large amount of fun!


Guild membership

...Is voluntary. No-one is expected to join a Guild if they don't wish to; and you should have a wonderful time here regardless. You won't miss any events by not being part of a Guild.

That said, the Guilds are the source of all sorts of insanely fun and creative ideas, as well as being a great icebreaker. We'd certainly recommend them and you can join the discussions about Guilds here.

(Admittedly, we're biased.)

Although members will generally be assigned to a Guild at random, you *can* change to another Guild when you arrive at the Convention. We'd encourage you to do this at the Guild Fair, which takes place on the first day of the Convention.

We do also take efforts to ensure that all children will be placed in a Guild with at least one of their parents.

Nothing that happens before the Convention is absolutely final (or we'd be History Monks!).
The Monks of Cool (a.k.a. the Guilds Team).
The great and wise in the Committee called upon us as part of their sage deliberations two years ago. The Monks of Cool are a roaming team of Very Mellow Individuals headed up by the Abbot of Cool himself. Our way is to promote cosmic harmony through the application of relaxation; to smooth troubled waters, to unfurrow Guild brows, to help the Guilds get what they need to get to do what they want to do.

(Within reason. Since the Thieves Guild ran off with our I.W.I.N. button, we do have to say no on the odd occasion. But we don't like saying no and would much rather say 'Wow! cool!')

We will assign deputies, handle transfers, answer your questions, advise on the feasibility of Guild plans, assist where we can, and keep track of the score during the Guild Competition.

Each guild will have two deputies who will be in charge of their day-to-day activities. We are currently in the process of recruiting these. Should they encounter any problems, or be uncertain as to whether it's a good idea to, say, paint the hotel black to match their clothes, we will be at hand to help with friendly advice and blunt instruments.


The Rules
There are one rule and two recommendations, handed down from the timeless wisdom of the Abbot himself. If you stick to these, all will have an excellent convention, and we'll have less to do, leaving us more time to, well, be cool.

* Be excellent unto one another.
* Have fun
* Make fun for others

We look forward to helping you make things incredibly groovy.

The Monks of Cool.

Nearly there!

Looking forward to seeing you all on the 27th!