Wow, I’m tired… How on earth did I end up this tired at 8pm at night? Ah, yes, the Discworld Convention.
Last time (was it really 2 years ago?) I wrote up some articles based on what I did at the convention as it went along. This time, as it is my second convention, I thought I would be truly original and do the same thing, only with the experience of actually having been to one of these things before.
Some of you will be thinking “What happened to Friday? Surely that was Day 1”. Unfortunately, I was unable to get the Friday off work and so we only arrived at the convention on day 2… which I’m calling day 1… hmm… this could get confusing.
Right, on with the info. We intended to arrive at the convention at 8.30 but, due to us having two small kiddies (Darpebble and Darchip), we ended up arriving at 9. We reached the Lancre Forge (after some initial guesswork) to be told that Registration was being held in Ops. We then went to Ops and were told that they had left 5min ago to transfer to Lancre Forge. All this meant that by the time we reached the Registration, time was running out for the Guild Meetings and we had to scatter. On the plus side, we pretty much knew the layout of the rooms and we knew that the convention was ON!
Wizards Guild Meeting: I can’t tell you what happened in here… no, really I can’t. I was a little late to the show, so I missed a lot of what the guild had planned. I did catch on that they had a few items that they were trying to schedule, such as “Hut, Hut!” and a “Wake up with Wizards” along with some unusual messaging services. More of the “Hut, Hut!” later.
The Weakest Guild: Ah, a quiz! Surely, the wizards (obviously the cleverest of the conventioneers since they have a university) would win this hands down. Unfortunately, this was not to be. Our wonderful, creative, brilliant and downright lethal dictator, The Patrician, had agreed to ask the questions (which were very tough) and he was only slightly biased completely unbiased towards the Assassin entrant.
Our entrant, though brilliant, had been caught before his 12:00 breakfast and was obviously at a distinct disadvantage as no reasonable person should be expected to function before breakfast. He therefore slipped up and was voted out by the Patrician – you know the drill: One man, one vote – when there was a tied vote from the contestants. The winner in the end was the Witches Guild entrant who was obviously cheating as no-one should know all those answers (well done to an exceptional winner).
Time Bending with Lupine: Ah, a crass conjurer. A purveyor of tricks and legerdemain. On behalf of the Wizards of the Discworld, I can, as a previously registered member of the Guild of Conjurers, be absolutely certain that no magic was actually performed. It is our duty as official Wizards to ensure that such tricksters do not use actual magic in pursuit of their craft. All of his incredible feats were done without the use of real magic, despite the somewhat incredible nature of some of the items in his repertoire. Despite my obvious and necessary displeasure at such crafts as his, I was nevertheless somewhat entertained at the obvious delight provided to those of other, less knowledgeable professions.
Candle Making: After the magic show, I took Darpebble and rushed over to the Candle Making to try our hand. She and I were suitably impressed with her creation and she proudly presented it to Darwife after the event. You never know, it might even come in handy for some summoning ritual at some point. After this we did find the time to pop into Chaos Costuming, where there is loads of interesting fabrics and stuff to use if you need it.
Lunch: Wow, we actually found time to take a break and eat something. No really. Maybe those schedulers actually planned it that way. Anyway, onwards.
Puppet Workshop: I had the rather surprising pleasure of taking Darpebble to this while my wife and son spent their time in Disc is Your World. We made ourselves sock Nac Mac Feegles of varying sorts and some of the creations were absolutely incredible.
Bernard had the remarkably tough job of judging the various creations and decided that everyone should win (very magnanimous since my creation was very average compared to some of the others).
My particular favourite was Bernard Nac Mac Feegle which we kept hidden till last. The intention from this event is to hold a Puppet Show Nac Mac Feegle version of Where’s My Cow tomorrow (it’s on the schedule). I hope people enjoy the show. Scheduling may prevent my participation, but hopefully Darpebble will make it.
Face Painting and Tattooing: Hmm… My daughter became a Tiger. I went for a well deserved pint and chat with some of my fellow Wizards. After all the excitement and entertainment of the day, I felt it was necessary. It also gave me time to write up some notes, which you are now reading the product of.
So that’s it. That’s all that I did for day 1 (or is it 2?). We set off for home to recoup and prepare for tomorrow. How will that go I wonder? Well, I’ll let you know tomorrow. I’m completely wiped out – probably has something to do with getting up before 12.
Hut, Hut!: Oops, did I forget this? From what I understand, there are a bunch of people for whom this particular event will not be forgotten. If you want the details, hunt out the gossips. Far be it from me to spoil the fun of this particular tail. The same Wizards are doing the Wake Up with Wizards in the morning, so if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, get up and join in the fun (and ask about Hut, Hut!).
I hope you enjoyed my brief report on the day and that you can take a little appreciation of some of the events that you may have missed. There is always too much to do at the convention and I know that I do not get to everything I would like to (they’d need a week).
Enjoy your convention,
Darrock (Wizard, 1st Class)
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